Well, not entirely. I also wanted to try being someone new, void of developed conceptions; clean slate for my personality to reflect off of.

. . .

I have regrets, and I have scars that incur neurotic tics every time I remind myself about them, but I'm not ashamed.

You're someone new every day. For better or worse, we never stop changing, so it's good to live with the intent on changing for the better.

Part of the problem with being open with our flaws on the internet is that, while what we share isn't written in stone, it's more permanent and more clear than relying on memories alone, and sometimes we find ourselves embarrassed by how we behave. That's good, because if we weren't embarrassed, then that means we're not growing.

I think about you from time to time and wonder how you're doing. I'm glad to see you're still upright and moving along and it honestly sounds like you've grown quite a bit too. Keep on growing and when you think you can't grow any further, find a new direction to grow in.

~rd95

Empathy is understanding that everyone sees the world through their own filter that causes them to interpret everything their own way. This is particularly difficult on the internet where we know so little about anyone else; we occupy a funhouse full of mirrors reflecting ourselves back at us, each with opinions and thoughts loaned by a disembodied voice we will never truly hear.

Likewise, there are some lies we tell ourselves while believing we're telling them to everyone else. The heartbreak is that no one else cares enough to try to tell the difference.

Welcome. Stay a while. And should you run into difficulties again, try to work it out with that person instead of marshaling the court of public opinion. We're all humans. We'd all rather get along than otherwise. But we're all dealing with our own bullshit and it takes more patience than we can muster sometimes to pick our way through the minefield of someone else's neurosis.

PS. If you were to write a theme for Hubski, rather than rewriting Hubski, I would happily try it out.

I mean, c'mon man. Hi, guys, what you been up to, I feel bad for being dishonest, I miss you though, even though this specific guy was a dick, here lemme link it.

You wanna hang out and be friends? hang out and be friends. Welcome. Dredging up stuff to re-litigate it is the wrong move and you know it. Especially when you finish with "And sure, you could argue that maybe what I said wasn't that good, or that I was off-tone, or maybe the wording wasn't perfect, but... nah, not today." So you don't really want to talk about it, but you insist that we all hang onto it as context.

It's your context, not ours. This is what I'm talking about: if you see others' contexts, rather than assuming they're all using yours, you cause fewer misunderstandings, which I'm certain is a desire of yours. Here I am, writing three paragraphs to justify the word "backhanded" in order to match your perspective - wanna try it on your own? It causes less animosity.

I was hoping to not read this:

"The fungus hasn’t acted alone; humans have been its unwitting accomplice. A genetic study led by Matthew Fisher from Imperial College London suggested that Bd had originated somewhere in Asia. From there, one especially virulent and transmissible strain spread around the world in the early 20th century—a time when international trade was booming. Infected animals could have stowed away aboard ships, or been deliberately transported as food, pets, or pregnancy tests. Either way, the killer strain eventually spread to five other continents."

Once again, humans and their killing actions...

And because I give a shit. I feel like this is something most people discard about me.

Have you tried giving a bit less of a shit? I have trouble relating to any "pressure" you felt being here. I don't want to minimize your troubles, but this is just a forum on the internet. Sure, we're all real people with real feeling and lives. And we shouldn't be dicks to each other.

I've myself made some great connections on here, and even met more than a couple awesome folks IRL :)

But it's also just a forum on the internet after all. You don't need to have an all out or all in attitude. Just come hang out when you feel like it. And you can also take breaks from time to time without "quitting". And not get too bogged down about what some assholes on the other side of the world that have never met you think of you. There are more important things to care about.

bf likes talking on the phone and texting more than I do, but we probably like each other about the same. Have you talked to her about it?

Leavers are like fucking schoolchildren... just no clue how the world works. It's just so ... pathetic. You watch the kid tie a sheet around his neck like a cape, climb up onto the roof, and he smiling and so excited as he runs to the edge of the roof and...

A lot of the people who voted leave are in relative poverty. Barely living paycheck to paycheck in rundown ex-industrial towns where half the shops on the high-street are boarded up. No opportunities, no prospects, having to use food-banks and community projects just so they don't go hungry. Since 2010 there's been 8% cut in education, an almost 3000% rise in the amount of necessary foodbanks, and a 169% increase in homelessness. The government 'broke the contract'.

It's a bit rich to expect a person who may be wondering where their next meal is going to come from to be clued up on geopolitics and the intricacies of economy and trade. To expect them to understand a process which has reduced the UK parliament into chaos and a laughing-stock. It serves no purpose to liken them to school children and call them pathetic.

All recent history has shown them is that the rich get richer and nothing improves for the working class. Then the 'Vote Leave' campaign comes along and is the first thing in a long time to speak directly to them. To directly address their problems and struggle. It doesn't matter that it's all bullshit and populism; you'll grab onto any ledge you can when you're in free-fall, even if it's just to bring the person who pushed you down with you.

The Guardian has been doing a great video series called 'Anywhere but Westminster'. It's certainly helped me with empathise with those I had no understanding of back when this all started:

I had a long phone call after a bunch of frustrating text messages. That was supremely helpful. That led to an in-person conversation that was honest. I told her all the above, and it didn't scare her away. We have more plans to see each other.

Honesty, as ever, is the best policy. That and in-person conversations.

It's a bit rich to expect person a who may be wondering where there next meal is going to come from to be clued up on geopolitics and the intricacies of economy and trade.

This is what has bitten the Democrats in the ass so hard in the US: Republicans say "it's the darkies!" while Democrats say "...it's complicated..." and the minute you need a powerpoint to give a man a reason he can't afford to send his kids to college, you lose.

"You've been living a charmed life on the massive pillaging of generations' worth of natural resources and now that the bill has come due your children will live a twilight impression of your postindustrial glory" isn't a comparable chant to "drill baby drill." Americans don't learn the austerity the British Isles suffered under after WWII - we just know the Marshall Plan. And we don't know that Saudi Arabia and Iran became de facto American protectorates at the cost of the UK, we just know that we won the goddamn war and to the victor go the spoils.

Name: swedishbadgergirl

Location: Sweden

Age: 20

Current Preoccupation: Studying, playing Pokemon Go, trying to get more organised, local politics, swimming.

previous Preoccupations: Studying, having slightly different but similar interests, being a disorganized mess.

I check in on hubski sometimes, very occasionally, not at all in an organized fashion. It is one of the nicest online communities though, and because of that I keep coming back.