Interesting article by Rebecca Solnit. Interesting comments and responses as well.
Insightful on the differences between how men and women perceive the world. Here's one difference. If someone is explaining something to me about which I am an expert, I would try to gently correct them. If they protested further, I would turn into a smug, snarky asshole who wants to make that person feel 2 inches tall. I don't know many women who would behave this way (and maybe the world is better for that, as we don't need twice as many jerkoffs in the world). Self confidence is transcendent of gender. Belief in oneself is freeing, but no one can give that to you; you have to realize that only you can provide it for yourself. I don't know if society conditions women to not be confident in themselves--or if there is something more innate about it--but in a Western country where opportunities abound there is nothing holding women back but themselves. Self confidence and mental freedom come from within, and its up to each of us to decide we're worth it, men and women.Men explain things to me, still. And no man has ever apologized for explaining, wrongly, things that I know and they don't.
Arrogance might have had something to do with the [Iraq] war, but this syndrome is a war that nearly every woman faces every day, a war within herself too, a belief in her superfluity, an invitation to silence, one from which a fairly nice career as a writer (with a lot of research and facts correctly deployed) has not entirely freed me.
IMHO there is cause for a new wave of feminism in the US with less focus upon gender roles and more focus upon just getting more control of the power structure. At the same time, assholes are assholes as a matter of course. Mr. Very Important II probably makes a habit of the behavior, and it might be better viewed as an opportunity to stomp on pompous behavior than as a challenge to personal credibility. I realize this is one incident that speaks to a pattern, but the underlying this pattern is the fact that "Mr. Very Important II's" aren't perceiving legitimacy, so there is no cause to give them deference. This is where the pattern needs to be attacked.
Metafilter had some good commenting on this yesterday all while introducing me to the term "mansplaining".
wow,Thanks Psulli. There were 531 comments to this article on Metafilter, many of them pointing out issues and problems with the article and others discussing good and bad explaining. I'm not fond of gendery generalizations. I am fond of looking at communication problems, however perceived - hence my posting this article. I agree with mk's point that people who "hold forth" and do not perceive the legitimacy of other people (who might be female) rather than communicate should not be deferred to. b_b talks about the confidence it requires to call people out. Confidence, often perceived as rudeness, might make it possible to let an explainer know. What we need is a (non-sarcastic) cheat sheet at the tip of our fingers to use to interrupt holders-forth. Maybe I'll write one.
Sarcasm: "Excuse me, I think you're mistaking me for someone who doesn't know about that topic."
Not Sarcastic: Jim - Jim (get his attention). Jim!!! Just a minute. Before you talk further about that topic, you might want to learn a little about what I already know. For example... (sigh) so so hard... esp. getting his attention.
Anyway, I like the voices at Hubski! - Lil
That article is certainly pointing out something truthy. I could feel my man-rankles go up a little. Which in the past has proven to tell me that although what I am reading/listening to has upset me a little ... it is probably worth spending more time thinking about the reality. I like the hubski voices, too. I just wanted to add some context from another web community.