ok.... so..... I am going to think out loud for a few minutes - and then let you guys shred me. This isn't a season problem. This isn't a direct government or school district problem. This seems to be a "Uh oh - I had kids and they're really expensive" problem. This feels like one of those "issues" that is a symptom of MANY societal problems, not in any order: - Low wages. The fact that it takes two people to make roughly what previous generations could do with one breadwinner. KB posted about this earlier today - Breakdown of the family. Where are the dads in this story? I think I only read of one couple who were sharing the financial burdens. The majority of those quotes came from single moms getting paid too little. Where in the hell are all of the dads? (I know there are some working dads out there struggling and I would say "where are the moms?"). - Unreasonable Expectations. I get it. Little Johnny and Suzie down the road get to go to space camp this year. But guess what - they're going to get new cars when they turn 16 and their parents will pay for college too. Some people get the extra stuff and some people don't. Summer camps are "extra stuff". I'm not necessarily opposed to year round school. From an academic sense - it seems logical. But it doesn't solve the childcare issue. If it's the same number of days off - it's going to be the same problem for working parents. I see it every year with my coworkers and the other parents at school. But "camp" in February in large swaths of the country will SUCK compared to "camp" in the summer. I don't know if I have a point... this article just kinda.... rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe the author is surprised that it's totally fucking expensive to have kids? Or that it's REALLY inconvenient to your career and hopes and dreams to have them? I dunno... low wages, busted up families, it all plays a part. I think I'm getting a little tired of people having kids without planning for it and wondering who is going to solve the problem? My wife and I chose to have kids.... and by today's standards we have a HUGE family. And we go without a LOT of extra stuff that other people have because of it. But I also acknowledge that I'm super fortunate. I earn a decent wage and my wife and I tackle this crap together. I am a lucky bastard.“I just want her to be able to do those great activities that would make her summer memorable,” said Ms. Castillejos of her daughter. Instead, her daughter’s summers are looking like the ones she remembers from her own childhood: “By the time I was 12 or 13, my mom had to leave me at home by myself. She had no other choice.”
This is a real problem in the western world. Having a population maintenance number of kids (2 or fewer) should not this darn expensive. The lack of government provided child care services in the US is a real problem that helps create the divide between the haves and the have-nots. Part of the investment in our future comes from investing on our children and not punishing parents for having a normal amount of kids (I do think there should be large financial disincentives for having more than 2). Part of those are are from the person but its also a product of societies expectations. We expect the same levels of acceptable risks from the poor as we do from the well off. 30 years ago you could let your 6 year old ride a bus stay home and play in the neighborhood. These days if you even let your kid of of sight at the playground they call CPS on you. The level of acceptable risk when from low risk like 1E-5 to something crazy low like 1E-7 and costs have increased to match. Our society expects more and more supervision of kids and is happy to shift the costs onto those who have kids regardless of their ability to actually pay for these services. Its like were trying to intentionally price poor people out of the ability to have kids, but are instead just forcing more parents and kids into perpetual poverty.This seems to be a "Uh oh - I had kids and they're really expensive" problem
- Unreasonable Expectations.
Another issue worth considering is the frankly terrible sex ed that you find in most American public schools. steve isn't wrong about the issue of choosing to have kids, but I wonder how many of the children in the article described were unplanned. Yet another issue would be immigration, but that's a whole other kettle of fish.
I guess I look at this a different way. Let's assume we can comfortably say that it's a mistake for someone below a certain income threshold to have kids. Leaving aside all the issues incumbent with that, from declining population growth to the very serious moral questions, that still doesn't solve the issue of what to do with the low-income kids that we have. They're already here. So unless you're comfortable with Morlocks running around in a couple more generations, and unless you're comfortable with shafting people because they happen to have been born into unfortunate circumstances, we need to figure out what to do for these people. We also shouldn't poo-poo things like summer camp, either; we've become far too comfortable quantifying children's experiences in terms of how well they'll be ready to be good little robots. We chronically undervalue diverse experiences, and just plain doing things to make ourselves and others happy. Somehow everything has to be put to some kind of financial cost-benefit analysis. I hate to think about what future generations are going to be like if this is what they're taught to value.Maybe the author is surprised that it's totally fucking expensive to have kids?
Got a book for ya. The problem is this: 1) School funding becomes decentralized. Result: money from property taxes matters more than money from the federal government. 2) Neighborhoods balkanize into "good schools" and "bad schools" based on property values. Result: parents who care about their kids are more likely to stretch into a house they can't afford based on the school district it's in. 3) Families erode due to the unavailability of full-time parenting and lack of safety net provided by having a "spare" parent that can work during layoffs, etc. Result: divorces, latchkey kids, credit card debt, etc. Here's another book. Not all of it is about why the Continentals are better. A lot of it is about how the Continentals fucking fund childcare like it's an entitlement. Of course, they do the same with healthcare and all sorts of other Socialist ideas that will undoubtedly lead to the downfall of mankind, but the fact of the matter is, our free market system benefits people of means more than people without. The basic issue is this: You don't want it to be expensive to have kids. Those are your future taxpayers. Those are the people who will take care of you in your dotage. That's the workforce, the takers-of-jobs-you're-too-expensive-to-take. I'll be bald-faced about this: I evaluated that the middle class was doomed about ten years ago and resolved to do everything I can to get pushed up rather than down. Private school? Sign me up. rippin' daycare? Check. Extracurricular bullshit? 100%. I watched my girlfriend back in the '90s - who went to public school - and her little sister - who went to private school - and I watched their friends, their interactions, their hardships. Elitism is real. Massive kudos for you and your large family and your sacrifices. Just know that everything I do is going to be easier than you do, and everything I do for my kid is going to sting less, and that all those incremental advantages I provide are going to subtly tilt the balance in her favor until the advantages my kid reaps over yours will no longer be subtle, they'll be shocking. And I pay my taxes, and I vote for schools, and I firmly believe that every dollar I put into welfare pays itself back tenfold in public good but I'm also taking care of me. Because I have the means. I was a latchkey kid. I turned out okay. But I had a couple friends that got taken away from their parents by DSHS because their parents didn't have as good a system. The whole world benefits when you make it easier for the people who don't run the race as well as you do.
This reminds me of a point made by a Republican aide/operative who left the party in disgust. Maybe childcare-as-an-entitlement would be more palatable if it was pitched differently. “I like to pay taxes. With them, I buy civilization.” -Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.Here's another book. Not all of it is about why the Continentals are better. A lot of it is about how the Continentals fucking fund childcare like it's an entitlement. Of course, they do the same with healthcare and all sorts of other Socialist ideas that will undoubtedly lead to the downfall of mankind, but the fact of the matter is, our free market system benefits people of means more than people without.
You know that Social Security and Medicare are in jeopardy when even Democrats refer to them as entitlements. "Entitlement" has a negative sound in colloquial English: somebody who is "entitled" selfishly claims something he doesn't really deserve. Why not call them "earned benefits," which is what they are because we all contribute payroll taxes to fund them? That would never occur to the Democrats. Republicans don't make that mistake; they are relentlessly on message: it is never the "estate tax," it is the "death tax."
Right those people will be changing your diapers when you get old, and they will also be paying the bills and keeping the world running. If they are miserable they will do their best to share the pain and it will get really expensive for you to keep them out. My wife and I had this talk about sending our kid to private school and decided it wasn't worth it. We would be one of the poorer families in the group and that would really put a chip on the kids shoulder. She went to college with a bunch of Prep-School kids and she said too many of them where entitled arrogant snobs with poor work ethic. She didn't feel like that education gave them enough an advantage to be worthwhile and most of the reason they succeeded was that their parents were so well connected that the could have been illiterate and still landed great jobs. I dont really think one can buy the kind of education and environment that you describe having when you grew up. Something like that would be worth paying for your kid to have but I just dont think its for sale (or at least at a price that I can afford).The basic issue is this: You don't want it to be expensive to have kids. Those are your future taxpayers. Those are the people who will take care of you in your dotage. That's the workforce, the takers-of-jobs-you're-too-expensive-to-take.
I'll be bald-faced about this: I evaluated that the middle class was doomed about ten years ago and resolved to do everything I can to get pushed up rather than down. Private school? Sign me up. rippin' daycare? Check. Extracurricular bullshit? 100%. I watched my girlfriend back in the '90s - who went to public school - and her little sister - who went to private school - and I watched their friends, their interactions, their hardships.